How to reduce the suffering caused by attachment

how to reduce the suffering caused by attachment by Joy iseki

Attachment and expectations are at the root of emotional suffering.The idea that life ought to be only this particular way or else it’s not worth it. And because it isn’t so in the moment, you feel TERRIBLE living.This ideal life belief has led to the depression of many. Many of us have plans about how […]

How to practically improve on your emotional and mental wellbeing

When it comes to our emotional wellbeing, not many of us think we have a definite role to play to influence outcome for our overall good. I think the majority often assumes a victim role of blaming most things and people outside of their control than align with the path of their most control—within—which is […]

How your self beliefs affects your mental and emotional wellness

“Right believing would always bring about a right living, even in matters of mental health.” – Joy Iseki   All of us have certain beliefs about ourselves. We might not know them all consciously but we’re daily being governed through our beliefs about ourselves. Our mental and emotional wellness isn’t left out of this influence […]

How to deal with the emotional weights affecting your wellness

We want to travel light and be free from many things people complain about us, and which things we’re also fed up with about ourselves. I’m sure most of us truly desire a life with more ease and lesser emotional baggages. Because it seems we’re in constant fights with some overload of emotional weights whose […]

Dealing with the negative inner dialogue

As we have conversations with others so do we have same with ourselves. We think aloud more than we would want to believe. Self-talk is the conversation we’re often having with ourselves. This could be the feelings and thoughts that turns to the words we speak to and about the self, also known as the […]

What does it mean to love yourself

“When you’re different,  sometimes you don’t see the millions of people who accept you for what you are. All you notice is the person who doesn’t.”               – Jodi Picoult While self love have become a popular subject these days, I am one of those that still feels not […]

Why it’s important for you to be present in the moments

“If you want to conquer the anxiety of life, live in the moment, live in the breath.” -Amit Ray   There’s a reason why today is called the present. Like most words, it isn’t a mistake. Words are one of the most intentional things I’ve come to realize about the universe. This includes every words […]


“When you are healed, go out and heal others..” – Maya Angelou   Sometimes, I think being single, especially as a single lady, in Nigeria, can be one of the hardest things to be. If the married women are not thinking you are after their husbands, the single guys would be feeling cool with themselves […]


“If you do not believe that you deserve good, good may elude you.” – Joy Iseki In my last blog, I shared how it was important that we accept our shadow self, without feeling the need to hide it from who we are. Please read it here. Some issues were raised from that discourse. Part […]


“..because what you refuse to deal with may eventually deal with you.” – Joy Iseki When we were kids, we judged almost all things we did as nothing. We did most in the name of play, until the adults would catch us in these acts and attached meanings to our actions. We would then accept […]


These days a lot of things happen almost faster than the speed of light. This is the result of the fast paced era we are in. Most services can now be paid for in split seconds, with the products consumed almost simultaneously. Although this is a superb development but it comes with its own challenges […]


The subject of one having to accept oneself can be strange to hear among people who wonder how anyone could have rejected himself by the way. Literally, it wasn’t that you told yourself to get off. No, nothing like that. It’s the subtle ways you treat yourself badly and so attract people who do same […]


We live in a part of the world here in Nigeria where we deny that many things exists, or can be practiced, just because a lot of these acts are being done privately. We deny that our people can be depressed. Or even experience passion for same gender. We refuse to accept that our children […]


I was in a youth train-the-trainer gathering where the facilitator raised the issue of self awareness. Then something happened that made me uneasy. It was how some people found the topic of self awareness totally new to them in that class. Although I am already aware of this, I still get sad every time I […]


  The subject of one having to accept oneself can be a debate sometimes, especially among people who wonder how anyone could have rejected himself by the way. Literally, it wasn’t that you told yourself “I refuse me henceforth!” No, nothing like that. These things are most times not done consciously but imitated rather unconsciously […]