How to deal with the emotional weights affecting your wellness


We want to travel light and be free from many things people complain about us, and which things we’re also fed up with about ourselves.

I’m sure most of us truly desire a life with more ease and lesser emotional baggages. Because it seems we’re in constant fights with some overload of emotional weights whose burden continues to push us down, making it harder for us to fly above the environmental factors limiting our happiness and peace.

But the weight is heavy. And how to go about losing it is even more difficult because of the ignorance about what these actual emotional weights are, and how to eliminate them once and for all since we’ve become tired of the trial and error methods of its elimination.

Too many things continues to weigh us down; from the beliefs we hold about ourselves to the long term conditioning we’ve been exposed to in our environment, to the ego stories now developed from our attempts at trying to survive what we went through all our lives, especially during the most difficult periods. These are the underlying causes we rarely talk about when it comes to emotional overload weighing us down in perpetual rollercoaster of emotional triggers and baggages.

Since we’re more focused on fixing the emotional reactions these more underlying issues have made us into, we keep missing the chance to deal from the root. No wonder the many self-help tips here and there isn’t working to lift the actual heavy emotional burden from this overweight.

While we concentrate on what’s obvious when it comes to letting go of what may be an emotional overweight, we are used to neglecting these more underlying causes.

The self-sabotaging mindset from certain beliefs we hold about ourselves, for instance, is part of the reasons we loathe ourselves, find it hard to create the boundaries that would have helped us prevent some unnecessary toxic relationships, which in turn adds more pain to our lives. It is also what makes us angry with the Self for how we couldn’t stand up for ourselves when people unjustly trampled on us; it is why we’re also in anger against those who made us seem less human by the demeaning ways they’ve treated us.

In all of these we might see our anger without knowing why exactly we’ve become an “angry person.” We concern ourselves more with the emotional reactions and our lack of limits without focus on the mindset or beliefs activating them.

This is why it’s important we understand the deeper underlying causes behind these emotional baggages.

I’m convinced that if we can see beyond the emotional reactions we display from the underlying issues, we’d be in a better position to see how the subtle but heavy emotional weights continue to press us down, and dwindle our chances of flying above the consequences they expose us to.

While we may see the feelings of sadness, anger, tantrums, unforgivenness, self-condemnation, grief, guilt, shame, self-blaming, and jealousies that have become a heavy burden to our heart as the weight of emotional baggage pressing us down and thus preventing us from being free because of the weights of the emotional energies in them, yet they’re merely results of the long term neglect of these other deeper underlying causes.

I guess we can see now that the main heavyweight of emotional overload isn’t what we commonly think it to be. It is more of what we’ve ignored and haven’t paid attention to over the years.

Yet no hope is lost.
Our first quest is becoming acquainted with the underlying causes so that we don’t continue to do peripheral works that only touches the surface of the issues only.

Having become aware of the more subtle emotional overweight overwhelming our mental and emotional wellbeing, the next step is becoming more observant about how we respond to the stimulus.

Awareness is only made fruitful by observation. Paying more attention to our responses, no matter how they may seem without judgment is the right step towards becoming free of their hold over us.

Unless you can be still enough to see how the stories you tell yourself through your ego for instance, is creating lots of limiting beliefs which are some of the causes of the emotional weights you now have to bear, you’d continue to blame others for what you have the control of.

Question your beliefs. As you observe yourself and become more aware of these things, become comfortable questioning some of the beliefs and conditionings which you had been modelled to, and which you have come to accept as your truth despite how much pains and sufferings they’ve brought your way.

Again, majority of the feelings of anger, sadness, projections, blaming and unforgivenness we have to deal with in our personal and interpersonal lives stem from these more underlying beliefs we have about ourselves, environmental conditionings and ego stories. These, are from the kind of early childhood experiences and the environment we’ve been exposed to throughout our lives.

Until we see the emotional weights this way, we may spend more time going round in circles about treating only the obvious emotions, which are merely a part of the branches, without a pragmatic solution at hand that deals with the deeper root where it keeps shooting out from.

To fly we must travel light, most of which entails us working from within to deal with the real issues. It’s our weight and therefore our job to unburden. No excuses will sort them out for us. Not even the continued projections on others will take the weight off our lives. This is the personal work each of us must do by ourselves.

Otherwise we may remain down for a longer time in our quest for emotional wellness with the messy trail they leave us with.

Watch my YouTube video on dealing with emotional baggages here

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To your healing.

Joy Iseki.

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