From our last discussion of last week, we had established what Self-awareness is and I did try in that post to briefly highlight why it’s important that we become self-aware. However, in this best, I hope to delve more into the basic reasons why self-awareness matters to us, especially in the times that we are in now.

From our discussion of last week, you’d have seen that the definition places a lot of emphasis on our inner self, especially as regards those intangible part of us such as our thoughts, feelings and emotions. We must understand that self-awareness is primarily about having an open mind of who we are and who we seem becoming. It is not about self-judgment really, but a conscious awareness of self so you can be better intimated with who you are relative to who you are perceived to be by others.

Personally, I like to see self-awareness as an exercise into “self-intimacy.” I think I understand it more in that regard; at least that’s how it helped me more.


We are an accumulation of everything that has ever happened to us in some ways, especially in the ways our mind deals with the experiences of our life. It’s the reason we seemed conditioned in many issues around our lives and appearing to always seem predictable in similar situations. But when we train up ourselves to become more aware of this, it can help us to analyze some of our present experiences relative to the similar event that had happened in the past. This way, we can “reset” the auto piloting of our responses and or reactions to that similar experience.

This is really important because it can really help us to become more flexible with our thoughts as against the seemingly conditioning of our minds which can become the actual stronghold working against our personal growth. For me, this was where I had seen the need to make self-awareness more as a spiritual awakening and by this, I was totally transformed.

According to the renowned Psychologist, Daniel Goleman, self-awareness is the key cornerstone to emotional intelligence. I was at some point in my life where I seemed to have become too vulnerable with my emotions because I would sometimes not know how and in what ways to express how I felt. As I became more aware of my thoughts and feelings, I realized that I wasn’t as helpless as my emotions would make me believe then. This is really important and a key reason why we should become more self-aware because the ability to monitor our thoughts and feelings from time to time plays a fundamental role in helping us to know ourselves better.

Jessie Zhu (Positive Psychology Practitioner and personal coach), in one of her write ups as to why we should become self-aware, noted that self-aware people act consciously rather than react passively, tend to be in good psychological health and have a more positive outlook in life. They also have a greater depth of life experience and are more likely to be compassionate to themselves and others. I totally agree with her statement because I have had the experience. It is also important that you become self-aware and be in that state of not just knowledge of self but of a deep intimacy with self, such that it propels you to act and influence your responses.

If you think your emotions are starting to betray you more than you’d have it do, then you should start your journey of self-awareness too like I did. It would amaze you how much of yourself you really didn’t know before as compared to what you thought you did prior.

We live in a part of the world where these practices of the mind are rather left to chances because we would rather excuse those things which we have no control of as some form of bewitching. And this beliefs has somehow eroded us of what it means to be more evolved and thus denied us the much grace of taking responsibilities for our lives and its outcomes. It’s one of the reasons I have decided to bring this issues up for us to become more aware of who we are, so we can realize that we aren’t as powerless to some unknown spiritually controlling powers that we cannot see. We must know that we are actually the real power house!

We will continue our discussion on self-awareness next week. You can send in your questions and contributions in the comment section of this post, and i will gladly respond to them.

Meanwhile, get ready for my new show (Authenti-city) on It will be aired Wednesdays and Fridays at 6PM (WAT).


Joy Iseki

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